“Fierce Bitch”……it may sound a little scary to you. It may conjure up images of some mean woman that has contempt for most members of the human race. You may even think of someone you know- someone you know and do NOT like. I am here to forever change your opinion of the term. Not only that- I am here to offer you a chance to think of yourself differently and to help show you that being a Fierce Bitch is something to aspire to.
This whole thing started when I saw a friend’s status on Facebook. The instructions were to go on Urban Dictionary.com and look up your name. You were then supposed to copy and paste the definitions that came up as your status. I had really never paid much attention to the site so I had no idea what was in store. I typed in my name and this is what came up:
The most beautiful queens to ever walk the face of this earth…women named erica are fierce by nature and generally quite sassy.
“im pretty sure thats erica
I must admit…I laughed pretty hard at this so-called “definition” . “Fierce” and “Sassy” had been applied to me before and I always thought that all things considered, those particular adjectives were interesting and fun things to be. I have always been a girl who speaks her mind, is not afraid to state an opinion (even if it’s not the popular one) and I certainly do enjoy being a smart-ass if the opportunity presents itself. I love to make people laugh and have plenty of experience being the comic relief.
After laughing about it with some friends and then thinking about it a little more in-depth, I realized that being “fierce” is something that can and should be aspired to. I think we all want to be strong and independent without having to feel that in order to do so, we must sacrifice the right to our own femininity. Most of us do look up to women that have forged their own paths and broken through barriers.
I love the fact that Beyonce maintains her sanity by having an alter ego- “Sasha Fierce”. The Superstar performer that is utterly fearless and powerful on stage. Sasha Fierce can do anything and believes in herself completely so that every performance is amazing. Beyonce is able to be herself and have a real,authentic personal life as long as Miss Fierce goes onstage. No doubt one of the reasons that you never hear about Beyonce having melt- downs or substance abuse issues. If you’ve seen her interviews, you know that she seems genuine and unassuming and even a little shy. She is able to be what she needs to be to get her job done while still being a real person. True, we can’t all be Beyonce but we can be the very best version of ourselves, every day and create the lives that we desire.
On the other side of the spectrum, it seems that any woman who is strong, independent and knows what she wants can be subject to the “bitch list”. You‘ve seen it and heard it many times before….a strong, successful woman in business is referred to as “that bitch” when all her coworkers are off the clock. A woman that doesn’t take any crap in her relationship is known as a “real bitch” to that man’s friends …the list goes on and on. How many times have you seen a movie where the heroine starts off as a ”bitch” and then- with the love of a good man- defrosts and leaves her bitchiness behind in order to ride off into the sunset with Mr. Wonderful.
It seems to me, now that the word bitch is thrown around so carelessly and applied to anyone and everyone (even some men!) that we need a new definition for women that succeed in living their dreams. Can there be such a thing as a woman that can be strong, have opinions, get the things she wants in life but is also kind, loving, fun and happy. I know there is. I’m sure that you know there is too. I’ll even bet that you know a few and you may even be one yourself. After all -you are who you decide to be.
I hope I can inspire you with a few kind words, helpful hints and perhaps a few challenges to your usual way of thinking. Being a Fierce Bitch should be thought of as a compliment – go ahead for a moment and make a list- what would the qualities be ? . Here’s what I believe:
The Fierce Bitch is smart, she knows who she is and she’s not afraid, she can hold her own with anyone at anytime. She loves, works and lives fiercely and by doing so, does not need to bring anyone down or make anyone else unhappy. Whether she stays home to take care of a husband and family or goes to work and has a kick-ass career- it her choice and it’s the spirit with which she does these things that makes her wonderful. She’s always mindful of how important it is to be kind and emphasize the positive. She is well aware that despite having many well-laid plans- crap does happen- and when it does, she gets through it with grace and faith. She tells the truth, is loyal to those that she chooses to be close to and never settles for mediocrity. She values her life and her health and counts all she has as blessings.
Thanks for considering the thoughts that I have to offer- I hope you have fun here!