You have some time to yourself so you decide to log on to your favorite social media site. You look forward to seeing what your friends are up to, checking out your single friend’s funny pictures and your married friend’s “adorable” pictures of their children. You may even have something great to post yourself. You are scrolling down through all the breaking news and them BOOM- there is it. One of your Friends bitching about work, complaining about service they received or maybe even nailing some other unsuspecting Friend for some rude behavior. This has become so common and annoying and there always seems to be THE ONE who’s smiling face belies a personality that is closer to someone squeezing and twisting a Styrofoam egg carton in your face.
There are always things happening that annoy the crap out of us- all you need to do is walk out the door. Complaining constantly about it all says more about YOU than it does about the person or people inflicting the damage. A bad attitude will get you a bad reputation and we all know that the world is severely lacking in those that possess grace and humor in difficult situations. Go and take an analysis of your Wall or Page. Are you bitching about random stuff most of the time ? Are you constantly complaining about your job and coworkers ? Then there’s my favorite: Someone posts a cryptic, slightly disturbing message and when asked if anything is wrong by a well-intentioned friend, the person comes up with “oh…it’s personal. Message me and I’ll tell you”. WHAT ?? If it was so “Personal” why in the world would you post it at ALL ?
If you are guilty of all or any of this, first try to understand that there is only one clear reason why you are doing it: ATTENTION. You want to be heard and you need to hear a kind word from your friends. The problem is that getting attention for negative behavior is BAD. This is the equivalent of a four year old throwing a huge tantrum in a grocery store. You show yourself to be immature and incapable of handling life’s usual craziness. You are no worse off than anyone else that leaves their home every day. YOU just seem to need a medal for it.
I know a girl in her early twenties that is in a Customer Service job. One of the most difficult things in life is serving the public and no one can blame her for the frustrations and craziness she encounters daily. The problem is that the bitching, whining and anger NEVER STOP on her Facebook page. One day, her job came to an end but instead of switching careers and finding something else to do that would be easier on her emotionally, she bitched and whined about losing the job ! She proceeded to nail her employer for the way it was handled and cry about how impossible it would be to make ends meet without the job, as she was already struggling. A few weeks later, she received another job in the same field. It was only a matter of a few days before the bitching and complaining resumed. This is a “nice’ girl and she is young but believe me, this behavior will not serve her well in the Professional World. Any potential hiring manager would take one look at her Facebook page (and they DO these days !) and shudder- there would be no way she would even be considered. As for her Friends,they care about her and want the best for her but it’s clear that she will always have difficulties unless her attitude changes.
There are many ways to handle daily frustrations and there are many ways to handle yourself. Here are a few ways to be a little more Fierce and a little less Bitch:
If you HATE your job- change it. There is something you would rather be doing, something you are good at and something that will pay you the same or better. Be positive, put the word out and consider everything. A willing heart and an open mind will get you anywhere you want to go.
DO NOT post negative, mean, incendiary or cryptic status updates. It is one thing to have a bad flight and post about it- it’s quite another to spend every day nailing the job that is providing you with a living. You may say that you do it with “humor” but no current employer will see it that way and no potential employer will consider you a risk worth taking. It’s not cute, it makes you look like a pain in the ass and it shows you to be immature and unprofessional.
Everything you post is there FOREVER- period. That alone should make you think HARD. Your current situation is just that- current. Life changes and you will change. Do you really want to look back in a few years and cringe? Would you want your children to see ALL the stuff you do and say right now ? If you met the perfect partner tomorrow, what would he or she think of you after viewing your profile ?
Being a Fierce Bitch requires a good mind and a good heart. Check yourself and put your best self in focus. I will leave you with one of my all-time favorite quotes from a true Fierce Bitch, Maya Angelou:
“I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he or she handles three things: a rainy day, lost luggage and tangled Christmas Tree lights”
I’ve missed you ! Have a great week,