We all know how important it is to visualize what we want to materialize for ourselves for the future. We have seen the videos and read the books on making sure that your vision of what you want for yourself is clear and precise. Some even go so far as to tell you that you must create a Vision Board or collect images of the things you want to materialize in your life. You can watch “The Secret” a million times and feel that positive “ I can be that!!” energy flowing through you. It’s all inspiring and wonderful and blah, blah, blah ! BUT there’s a huge part of it that I believe will sometimes be missed by even the most well-intentioned. Can you see YOURSELF in that future AND can you believe it ?
I think that when people start to set about creating the life that is desired, they think of circumstances or objects appearing. A new job, love, money , a new home, a new car…. How many can actually see and believe themselves in a new role? or do they believe it’s just a fantasy? Seeing themselves actually living in that new life in a completely different way than they do now. It just makes sense that if you are wishing for sweeping changes- it means that you will have to change too. For most people- therein lies The Rub. People hate to change, hate to change the way they think and the things they believe BUT how can change come otherwise ?? How will your desires manifest if you keep doing the same things , in the same way?. They can’t – they won’t and that’s why people give up.
For instance…let’s take ME ! Haaa!! Why Not ?? Cuz you know…everything I write here is inspired by what’s happening in my life. Sometimes I need a pep-talk and a much needed shove in the right direction for myself so here goes. I am a full-time Wife and Mother . I am CEO of my Household and that is a BIG job. I have 4 step-kids-only 2 are still living at home. I have 2 kids of my own. The kids at home aren’t really “kids” anymore… 2 – 19 year old boys in College but still living at home ( one is my husband’s son and one is mine) and 2 girls- 16 & 15 ½ ( again- 1 my husband’s and one mine) in High School. My husband has week on/week off custody.5 years ago,I met my Husband and decided to move about 100 miles South from where I lived before, where my ex still lives and where my kids go to school. During the school year, I stay 2 days per week up there and the weekends that they are with me are spent down here where I live now. I have it down to a science and although it can be inconvenient at times, it’s what I had to do to stay with my children and yet live where I wanted to live with my new Husband. Aaahhh….what we do for LOVE ! What can I say?… it is what I wanted and I made it happen. It works for us and I am so blessed that I have children that were willing to be with me no matter what.
The next couple of years will bring changes and I will inevitably… one day….. eventually be an Empty Nester ( God Willing ! LOL) I think about what that will be like, how it will feel and what I will do with my time. Here’s the thing:I SEE myself as Wife/Mother/CEO of My Household. I’m great at that career- I have full confidence. I work my ass off and I always say- this is the job where you never clock out and you never get paid ( at least not in tangible currency!) In the near future, I will need a new role and this career will become obsolete. If I want a happy, fulfilling future, I MUST start SEEING myself as capable in a whole different life. I MUST define what that life is to be, start laying the groundwork NOW and visualize myself capable and great at whatever role I decide to take on.Then…I have to BELIEVE it! When I contemplate that in my highly organized, analytical Taurus mind- it all sounds doable. When I let the 3 AM Dooms take over- I imagine all sorts of scary scenarios where I am left adrift and left behind in a world that is fast paced and unkind to those who are a little more “mature”. Oh the Humanity !
It is imperative that we are able to SEE ourselves evolve into what we hope to be and it is imperative that we believe it. Some people are great at reinventing themselves and rising like The Phoenix. I realize that by the act of moving away from my former home and creating a new life in a new place- I’ve already done exactly that. It didn’t seem so brave at the time, it was more like: “There’s what I want and this is what I have to do to be there” . I was really ready to close a door and open a new one. Perhaps it will be that way again when the time comes. I just know that seeing myself in a new light and believing that I can be successful with a different focus is the key to it all. A true willingness to take on new challenges and goals is what it will take.
If you are contemplating BIG moves and BIG changes, start seeing yourself in those roles. Be realistic but try to keep the fears in check. Be kind to yourself and give it time. Most importantly- you gotta BELIEVE!
It’s your automatic first response that matters. It’s what’s on your heart. Think of yourself in whatever role you hope to attain. Is the very first, unedited thought that comes to your mind one of the following?:
We’ll maybe one day- after I finish school, get married,move out, insert any excuse here
My boyfriend, wife, parents or friends would flip out!
No way- that will cost money!
Wow…..I will have to CHANGE EVERYTHING !!
I know that I have done that- there were times in my life that I did only that. I have begun to acknowledge and STOP every time I do this now and reboot my attitude. It’s hard but I think realizing what your thoughts contain, acknowledging them and then being able to take a moment to change them are the most important steps to take to bring about a transition. If you know what you want- and that is THE most important thing- then you must realize that only YOU can draw it to you.
Take a day to stand back and take inventory of your thoughts. Analyze, don’t’ beat yourself up and change them if necessary. Let me know if any of you are thinking along these lines and if you are really believing that you can reach your goals. We are all so hopelessly, irrevocably human but there is hope for every one of us and our very own minds hold the key.
It’s like my favorite, Bad Ass President said:
“All the resources we need are in the mind”- Theodore Roosevelt
Ain’t it the truth !!
Thanks for your precious time,